"Name?"
"Huai Shi."
"Age?"
"17."
"Gender?"
"..."
In the solemn silence of the office, Huai Shi slouched in his chair and couldn't help but sigh, "I mean, Old Fu, what's the use of all these fancy processes every time?"
SMACK!
The man behind the desk slammed his hand down in anger. "Who are you calling Old Fu!"
Huai Shi let out a sly chuckle, proudly sticking out his leg. "We're of equal rank now. If I don't call you Old Fu, would you prefer Uncle Fu? Even trying to take advantage of the Astronomical Society, aren't you going too far!"
"You still remember you're an Inspector for the Astronomical Society!"
Director Fu grew even angrier. He pulled out a thick stack of papers from the cabinet and slammed them in front of Huai Shi. "This month's monthly report, the weekly reports, and the upcoming quarterly report—we've already collated everything here. Nag, nag, nag! I've nagged you a hundred thousand times, and I haven't seen a single word you've written! Get to work, already!"
"I've got Caven, alright?!"
Huai Shi argued righteously, "Besides, the deadline isn't even here yet, is it? Even if it's the end of the month, as long as it's not past midnight, it's not considered late!"
The utterly shameless person finished speaking, then adopted a pose as if to say, 'We at the Astronomical Society conduct our work and owe no explanations to anyone,' nearly driving Director Fu to grind his teeth to dust.
Ever since this little bastard became an Inspector, it's been a complete disaster. He doesn't do a single bit of proper work, just blatantly slacks off and steals a salary. Fine, let him slack off; after all, the money comes from the Astronomical Society. But there's still a ton of action files and maintenance work for the Current Circumstances that require an Inspector's participation! This bastard's slacking has spread from the Astronomical Society all the way to the Social Security Bureau! It makes me, Director Fu, who never tolerates a speck of dust in his eyes, grind my teeth in irritation! Watching a once bright and lively kid turn into a listless salted fish, a stubborn bronze pea, and I'm still powerless against him! I'm actually starting to deeply miss the days when Ai Qing was still around. She wasn't easy to deal with, sure, but there were never any problems with the daily work! Now, it's just great. Weekly reports aren't handed in until the very last minute, monthly reports aren't written until the 31st, and quarterly reports... Heh, what quarterly reports? When this guy first started, he'd at least go through the motions, typing up a few somewhat standard-looking documents on his computer. Later on, he just started tossing thirty blank pages stamped with the Astronomical Society's seal into the Special Affairs Department at the end of the month. Forget the documents, he even scrounges ink cartridges from the Special Affairs Department's printer! If that were all, it might be tolerable. After all, many Inspectors who are just coasting use their Astronomical Society permits to rake in dirty money, trying to squeeze some profit from the locals. From the Special Affairs Department's perspective, having someone as Zen-like and hands-off as Huai Shi is something they'd normally cheer for. But I really can't stand it anymore! Fine, don't come to work! But parading that pretty-boy Cowherd face around school every day, hanging around my own daughter... It makes my heart pound with unease! Can't you just fucking work properly?!
"Who says I don't work?!"
The expression on Huai Shi's face suddenly became serious. He slapped the table and shouted, "Do you know what day it is today?"
Director Fu was taken aback, then became utterly confused.
What day?
He picked up the desk calendar, flipping back and forth for quite a while. He found no to-do items or any special holiday marks, and grew even more perplexed.
"Today is the day of the college entrance examination pep rally, okay?!"
Huai Shi picked up his teacup and sipped leisurely, giving him a sidelong glance with a look of exasperated disappointment. "I skipped such an important day, missed the pep rally at school, to come here and meet with you, and this is what you say to me? Director Fu, do you even care about the blossoms of our nation's future?!"
Director Fu was stunned for a long moment, his face twitching. The veins on his forehead throbbed as if two children were playing jump rope there; with every pulse, it felt like four tiny feet were stomping on his brain, causing his intracranial pressure to surge.
Blossoms? If the nation's future has 'blossoms' like you, it's truly been cursed for eight generations! It took every last ounce of his self-control to convince himself not to personally execute this little bastard right here in his office.
He could only pant raggedly, forcing himself to look away.
Then, he saw Huai Shi's phone vibrating violently.
After three sharp alarm tones, a crimson message popped up from the Astronomical Society's internal app, startling Director Fu into a freeze.
An orange alert from the Astronomical Society? That's a major disaster warning, second only to alerts for things like floods or hurricane-level attacks! Something big has happened!
Huai Shi glanced down, then nonchalantly dismissed the alert with a wave of his hand. He went back to sipping his tea and said soothingly to Director Fu, "Don't worry, it's a small matter. It's been like this several times these past few days; these people are always making a mountain out of a molehill..."
"Would you just fucking look at what it says!"
Director Fu's eyeballs almost popped out of their sockets.
Normally, if it were something related to Xinhai, the notification from the Social Security Bureau would have arrived already. Since I haven't received anything, it most likely has no connection with Xinhai, or even the whole of Dongxia. But this was the first time I'd ever seen such a bastard dismiss a headquarters' warning alert with a 'none of my damn business' face. And judging by his tone, this wasn't even the first time! Saddled with an Inspector like this, can I really survive until retirement?
Once again, Director Fu sincerely doubted this from the bottom of his heart.
"Oh, right. What else did I come here for?" Huai Shi scratched his head for a moment, then finally slapped the table as it came to him. "The access permit!"
"..."
Expressionlessly, Director Fu pulled a box from his drawer, placed it in front of Huai Shi, and then pointed towards the office door.
Just get out.
"Alright, alright, I'm leaving... Old Fu, you're getting more and more inhospitable. Can't even spare a guy a couple more sips of tea."
Huai Shi put down his teacup, picked up the box, and turned to leave. Just as he was about to go, he suddenly remembered something and looked back. "By the way, I haven't seen Fu Yi in ages. Where'd she go?"
"..."
In the silence, Director Fu slowly picked up his cellphone, showing Huai Shi the contact for the operations team. "Believe it or not, one call to this number, and you're a dead man."
I believe you, I believe you, alright?!
Huai Shi pursed his lips and quickened his pace, beating a hasty retreat.
Every time I come to this damn place, I get interrogated. As if I'd want to come back!
"Oh, by the way, I've put the official seal on the A4 paper. Send someone over to my place to get it in a few days."
After walking a short distance, he turned back, poked his head through the door to add, but before he could finish, he saw Director Fu snatch the thermos from his desk and charge at him. Huai Shi hastily slammed the door shut and bolted.
Seriously, the guy's middle-aged and already carrying a thermos, yet his temper is still so explosive? Isn't he afraid of having a stroke or something?!
Huai Shi shook his head while walking out of the Special Affairs Department's gate. After tossing the box into his backpack, he took out his keys and realized he had forgotten where he parked his bike.
Immediately after, he heard the gatekeeper cursing loudly, "Who the hell did this?! This is the third time this month! Can't you park your crappy bicycle inside? You have to chain it to the gate! And if chaining it wasn't enough, you fucking hung it up! How paranoid about thieves can you be? Last time, you even scratched the Director's car! You trying to lose this month's salary?!"