Standing in the wilderness, Chu Zhao felt the bitter cold wind. Footsteps sounded behind her.
Chu Zhao didn’t turn around, seemingly unaware, until the person called out.
“Your Majesty the Empress is diligent in military affairs, but you cannot go without even eating,” Xie Yanlai said.
Chu Zhao said: “Her Majesty is not hungry. Her Majesty’s whole heart is for nation and people—drinking wind and dew water is enough.”
Xie Yanlai couldn’t help almost laughing aloud. This girl was just like this—able to speak frivolously with you anytime, anywhere, even at a time like this—
He suppressed his smile and stood beside her, tossing something into her arms.
“This humble general offers tribute to Her Majesty. Please graciously accept it,” he said.
Chu Zhao picked it up and opened the paper wrapping to find a roasted chicken leg. She made a sound of acknowledgment and nodded: “My dear minister is thoughtful. A’Le, reward him.”
A’Le laughed and responded beside her.
Xie Yanlai didn’t express thanks either, giving two dry laughs and turning his head to look at the thick ink-like darkness beside them. In the darkness, the city’s scattered lights flickered like stars.
Beside him, the girl quietly ate the chicken leg.
“If your heart is sad, have a good cry,” Xie Yanlai suddenly said.
Chu Zhao looked up at him while biting the chicken leg, arguing indistinctly: “What are you talking about? I’m not sad. I told you already, I was prepared long ago.”
Xie Yanlai looked down at her: “What good does being prepared do for something like a parent’s passing?”
The moment of loss still pierces the heart.
Preparation is merely helplessness—it doesn’t mean there’s no pain.
No regrets for the general, Father was happy—wearing these reasons like armor on body and heart, yet not even daring to enter the room where Father had stayed while alive.
Simply not daring to face that empty room, not daring to think about the person who could never be seen again.
Under the clear, cold moonlight, large tears rolled from the girl’s eyes. She hugged her knees and began to cry silently.
A’Le also began crying, wanting to complain that Xie Yanlai was truly annoying, able to make Miss cry with just one sentence. But she also felt relieved. When the General died, Miss had been calm and composed, fortifying defenses against Xi Liang, sending messages to the court, preparing the memorial ceremony—everything orderly and admirable. But she knew Miss wasn’t right like this, Miss’s emotions weren’t right at all.
When playing hide-and-seek as a child and unable to find Father, Miss could cry for ages.
Now he could never be found again—how much pain must Miss’s heart be in?
But she didn’t dare say it, didn’t know how to say it.
Fortunately, there was this Xie Yanlai who never knew how to speak properly.
Only he could make Miss cry.
A’Le watched as Xie Yanlai’s feet shuffled and he sat down beside Miss. She let out a long breath and backed away.
……
……
When Chu Zhao woke, the sky was already bright. Looking around, she was momentarily dazed, then recognized it as Father’s room.
She was still sleeping on the small couch beside the bed, but the bed no longer held her slumbering father.
Gone.
In this life too, she no longer had a father.
Chu Zhao’s heart suddenly stabbed with pain, a raw ache. She couldn’t help bending over to press her chest, when suddenly she felt something greasy. Something rolled from her collar—
The half-eaten chicken leg.
Chu Zhao froze, both annoyed and amused: “A’Le, A’Le!”
A’Le came running in from outside: “Miss is awake?”
Chu Zhao held the chicken leg and asked: “What’s going on? Not helping me change clothes or wash up is one thing, but why did you let me sleep clutching a chicken leg?”
A’Le laughed: “That’s not my fault.” She pointed outside, tattling: “It was Xie Yanlai who wouldn’t let me. He said to let you sleep like that, not to move you.”
Last night—Chu Zhao remembered she had been crying, and cried herself to sleep. Actually, ever since seeing Father, she hadn’t slept soundly.
“When you fell asleep, Xie Yanlai carried you back,” A’Le said. “He wouldn’t let me change your clothes either. He just removed your cloak and shoes, covered you with the quilt, and said everything else could wait until you’d slept well. That guy—”
Before she finished speaking, heavy footsteps came from outside.
Xie Yanlai walked in, saying coldly: “What about this guy?”
A’Le pursed her lips and said nothing more.
Chu Zhao smiled: “My dear minister is excellent.”
Did Xie Yanlai fear this? He was long accustomed to it. He gave two dry laughs: “Your Majesty is wise and brilliant.”