She lowered her head and was silent for a while, then couldn’t help but laugh.
“I want to understand him as a person.”
“You really won’t ask about historical truth?”
“No, I won’t. The current me can try to reconstruct his life from limited historical materials, while I in the Ming Dynasty would do more microscopic research.”
I nodded, “Then what would you ask him?”
Wan-wan rested her chin on her hand, “First question, does he have someone he likes?”
“He does.”
“What did you say?”
“I said he has someone he likes.”
Wan-wan dropped her hand from her chin, slowly sat up straight, looked into my eyes, and after a long while finally said, “Are you making this up?”
I nodded, “Yes, I’m making it up, you can treat this as a practice run.”
The candle flame flickered again, and a cold ancient feeling seeped through the shadows.
Wan-wan’s voice grew softer, but her emotions became more intense and complex.
“Second question, who is the person he likes?”
Looking at her, I answered, “Yang Lun’s sister, an official young lady, very beautiful and quite clever.”
“What does he like to eat?”
The question changed abruptly, but I still answered immediately. “He likes yangchun noodles, nuts, and apples.”
“What does he usually like to do?”
“He likes reading, soaking his feet for health, eating fruit, and he also likes making boxes for the official’s young lady. When he’s free, he’ll also cook, making food for the young lady.”
“How could he be such a person?”
“Because that official’s young lady wanted him to live well.”
“Did they have a sexual relationship?”
“Yes.”
“How did he learn?”
“He asked his colleagues and borrowed a book, though the young lady initially wouldn’t let him read it. He only gradually learned later.”
“Was he happy with that young lady?”
“He was very happy. Although at first he felt he would defile the young lady, that young lady made him swear that no matter how much he despised himself, as long as she liked him, he must live on well.”
“Did he and that young lady live together?”
“They did, in a single-courtyard house in the capital, they lived together for decades.”
“That’s wrong, he was executed by Lingchi in the first year of Jinghe.”
I laughed softly, lowering my head to respond, “Yes, I can’t continue making it up…”
“Deng Ying.”
“Yes?”
“If you were to continue making it up, how would you continue?”
“I would make up that the young lady later saved his life, brought him back home from the execution frame, and then he obediently recovered from his illness and injuries, living off her for many years at home.”
After listening to me, Wan-wan suddenly laughed, but as she laughed, she gradually pressed her lips together, her eyes becoming slightly red.
“What’s wrong, Wan-wan?”
Wan-wan avoided my gaze, “I originally thought your story was ridiculously made up, how could such serious history be so amusing? But when you mentioned him living off her, I suddenly felt that if he really could have lived that way, how wonderful that would have been, at least he wouldn’t have died tragically, right…”
“Mm.”
Wan-wan smiled as she wiped away a tear, looking up at me.
“I have one last question.”
“Ask.”
The candle on the table was almost burnt out, tree shadows falling across her body.
She reached out toward my wrist but stopped just before touching my skin.
She coughed once, then suddenly asked me: “Are you Deng Ying?”
I raised my wrist, looking back at her: “Yes, Wan-wan, I am Deng Ying.”
Wan-wan, whether or not I can fall in love with you again, I will always remember the “grace” and “feelings” between us.
Your humility towards the Ming Dynasty comes from my humility.
My courage in this world comes from your courage.
I do not fear becoming the evil one in the flood of history, bearing eternal infamy.
I am also willing to become an ordinary young man in this time, walking into your life, and living slowly together with you.
Your kindness towards me is a blessing.