That afternoon, I sat alone on the stool while Uncle and Auntie sat side by side on the sofa opposite, “seriously” questioning me. Wan Wan helplessly paced behind me, until finally, unable to bear it anymore, she pulled me up and said to her parents: “Aren’t you going home yet?”
“Oh, we’re going, we’re leaving right now.”
Auntie said while pulling Uncle up in the same manner.
I was pulled aside by Wan Wan, Uncle was pulled to the door by Auntie. Before opening the door, Uncle gave me a look – the complex emotions in his eyes, I still haven’t fully deciphered to this day.
Wan Wan watched her parents enter the elevator before finally sighing in relief, and walking back inside to start clearing the bowls and chopsticks from the table.
I wanted to help, but she blocked me, looking up with a smile: “This is my home, housework should naturally be done by me. You’re my guest, go sit on the sofa, I’ll get you something to drink.”
I sat back on the sofa, watching Yang Wan work in the kitchen.
She wasn’t very good at housework. By the time she finished clattering around with that pile of dishes, it was already past seven in the evening.
She took two cans of sparkling water from the refrigerator, handed one to me, removed her apron, sat cross-legged on the carpet by the coffee table, stretched, retied her ponytail, then opened her can and tilted her head back to take several big gulps.
“I’m sorry.”
She turned her head and smiled at me.
I looked down at her, silent for a long while before asking, “What’s wrong?”
Wan Wan turned back, “I’m the type of person who gets caught up in things and neglects everything else. I can’t cook, I burn pots, my parents want to find someone to take care of me, but that’s not fair. No matter how good a boy is, how well he understands life, he has his career and his own emotions. Before I learn how to get along with others, I don’t want that person to suffer.”
“I understand.”
Hearing this, Wan Wan laughed, “What do you understand, Deng Ying?”
“I understand that I need to wait for Wan Wan.”
Wan Wan seemed to freeze for a moment, lifting her sparkling water but not drinking.
“Did I save you before or something?”
“No.”
“Then why do you say that?”
I squeezed the can, speaking: “I like you, but I can’t offend you.”
Wan Wan was quiet for a moment, “Is this fair? Giving all the initiative to me?”
I bent down slightly, trying to get closer to her, softly answering: “Don’t worry, it’s fair.”
The past Wan Wan and the current me should both understand. The transformation of feelings between people needs time.
I spent decades with the past Wan Wan, but the current her has known me for less than half a year.
As Yang Wan said, this might seem unfair to me, but six hundred years ago, Wan Wan must have been like me now, carefully trying to maintain proper distance, measuring appropriate boundaries, and unwilling to presumptuously intrude on my life. Having lived in such a free and equal world, and having had such a happy family, I can only now begin to sense a corner of how exhausted Wan Wan must have been by my side.
So, this relationship now is fair.
I’ve come to repay my debt to Wan Wan. The only thing I hope Wan Wan will do for me is give me a chance.
Fortunately, she did.
“You have my phone number, right?”
“Yang Lin gave it to me when I was in the hospital.”
“Mm. My WeChat is the same number. When I’m not in the university library, I’m in my advisor’s research room. Next time you want to find me, don’t go to the cafeteria.”
Finally, I didn’t have to stake out the cafeteria anymore.
However, Wan Wan later went out of town for a symposium, and my project had to partially halt resampling due to missing parameters at the collaborating laboratory. I temporarily supported the secondary structure construction of a nearby project. The construction site for this project was near my rented home, and the project provided shuttle transportation, solving my temporary inability to drive. But because they were rushing this phase of the project, I also became very busy.
Wan Wan messaged that night saying she would return tomorrow morning. I had already arranged with the general supervisor to leave early, planning to have dinner with Wan Wan in the evening, but none of us could have anticipated that the next afternoon, on May 12, 2008, while the project was stockpiling materials and I was preparing to go up to the third floor to check the planted reinforcement, the ground suddenly began to jump. The engineer below immediately shouted to me: “Engineer Deng, don’t go up! Find a stable place to hold onto and stand firm!”
Then the building began to sway, and the workers all panicked.
“It’s an earthquake, everyone holds tight!”
After about twenty seconds, the stairway’s swaying subsided. Another project engineer and I immediately checked the walls and stairwell. During the secondary structure construction, the edge safety protection had been dismantled haphazardly for planting reinforcement and pouring concrete. After this shock, the scaffold wall connections had almost completely come loose. I shouted down: “The wall connections are loose, everyone evacuates outside first, we’ll bring the workers down right away.”
After coming down from the heavy structure and retreating from the site, we realized how severe this earthquake was. Everyone outside was still in shock, mobile signals were completely down, and transportation was almost paralyzed. Several geological engineers in the project team were discussing, saying they didn’t know where the epicenter was, but judging from the situation here, it was likely above magnitude 7.
I stood by the road trying to call Yang Wan but still got only a busy signal.
The project began implementing earthquake emergency procedures, cutting off power and water supply, checking personnel, and arranging supplies. I couldn’t leave my post temporarily. By the time I received notice that I could leave, the sky was completely dark.
It started raining, most bus services had stopped, and getting a taxi was even more impossible.
I borrowed an umbrella from the construction site and walked home in the rain. When I reached the entrance of the residential complex, I saw many people standing in the bicycle shelter outside avoiding the rain. Among them was someone crouching in the crowd with a white suitcase, completely soaked. I hurried over to help her up.
“Wan Wan…”
Unexpectedly, when she saw me, her eyes immediately turned red, “They said your construction site collapsed…”
“I’m fine, don’t believe rumors.”
Wan Wan coughed a few times, “I’m sorry, I don’t understand, I spoke nonsense…”
“It’s okay, it’s okay, don’t panic Wan Wan, why did you come to my area?”
Wan Wan rubbed her eyes, “The airport shuttle reached this area and encountered road closures, I had nowhere to go, and couldn’t contact my brother or parents either…”
I looked at her dripping hair, “Are you very cold?”