At night, Yang Wan also took a bath and lay in bed with Deng Ying.
Deng Ying had injuries on both his hands and feet. Yang Wan, fearing she might hurt him while sleeping restlessly, deliberately pressed herself against the wall, maintaining some distance from him.
However, halfway through the night, Deng Ying was awakened by a hand slapping his face. Opening his eyes, he saw Yang Wan curled up facing him, one hand pressed against his face, the other clenched into a fist against her chest.
Deng Ying reached out from under the covers and gently returned the hand that Yang Wan had placed on his face back under the blanket. But she remained restless, and before long, her hand found its way to his waist.
Deng Ying dared not move again, allowing Yang Wan to inch closer into his embrace.
Though Yang Wan was asleep, her rest was far from peaceful.
Deng Ying could faintly hear her calling his name in her dreams, her voice panicked and distressed, as if witnessing some terrible scene. But he couldn’t bear to wake her, only able to slowly comfort her by stroking her hair.
After spending time together, Deng Ying gradually becomes aware of the fear hidden in this woman’s heart.
Even though she never actively showed it, whenever she was with him, lying together with nothing between them, she would unconsciously reveal her vulnerability. That vulnerability had existed since her torture at the Zhengfu Court, yet, as if to suppress it, her resistance had grown increasingly fierce. Sometimes, she would even harm herself like Deng Ying did.
However, compared to Deng Ying’s self-discipline and submission to imperial power, Yang Wan’s resistance always carried a sharp edge. She didn’t accept Deng Ying’s fate, nor her own, nor even the fates of Yang Lun and Zhou Muyi. She always stood behind everyone, desperately trying to pull them away from the torrent of destiny.
History hadn’t changed, but hearts were changing.
Deng Ying couldn’t step outside himself to perceive the specific changes in his heart. But he discovered that he dared to let his body rest against hers when wearing thin clothes.
He dared to expose his imperfections before her.
He dared to embrace Yang Wan.
Outside the window, the wind rose, and cold seeped through the window cracks.
Rain pattered against the eaves.
Autumn sounds began rising from the moat as Deng Ying held Yang Wan, allowing her knee to rest between his legs.
“Wan-wan.”
Yang Wan’s spine trembled.
Deng Ying stroked her back repeatedly, softly saying, “For you, I’ll never absolve myself of guilt. Don’t be afraid, I’ll follow you.”
Yang Wan hadn’t heard these words clearly, but her nightmare dispersed.
For the next five days, Deng Ying was confined to bed by Yang Wan.
Yang Wan brought her own quilt from Chenqian Palace, its satin surface extremely soft, thick, and warm, carrying a faint feminine fragrance.
Deng Ying spent his days quietly in bed, mostly sleeping. When awake, he sat on the couch studying the construction plans for Cloud Cliff Hall.
Zhang Zhanchun’s construction notes had been lost, and Deng Ying began gradually redrawing the single-pillar structure based on his memories and the plans in hand. The official from the Ministry of Works responsible for reconstruction was Xu Qi, who had just returned from the Jingzhou river embankment. Having rebuilt the Hall of Supreme Harmony with Deng Ying before, they were quite familiar with each other. He came once in person to tell Deng Ying the details of Cloud Cliff Hall’s collapse. As Deng Ying listened and modified his drawings, within just two or three days, he had sketched out most of the crucial aspects of the single-pillar structure.
During this time, Yang Wan embarked on a terrifying enterprise—preparing medicinal meals.
She borrowed recipe books from the palace kitchen’s female officials and sat beside Deng Ying to “research” with him.
Just like when she took notes, once she focused on written materials, she became extremely concentrated. Deng Ying noticed she liked to draw diagrams with many framework lines, first establishing the baselines before adding text. Yang Wan called it a “mind map.” Though it looked intimidating, the final results didn’t quite match her serious attitude.
After drinking Yang Wan’s black fish soup for two days, Li Yu finally couldn’t help asking Deng Ying, “Can you sleep at night after drinking Yang Wan’s soups?”
Deng Ying smiled and said, “I’ve been taking so much medicine these days that my taste is ruined. It tastes better than medicine.”
Li Yu rolled his eyes, “Who prescribed you medicine anyway?”
“Imperial Physician Peng.”
Li Yu clicked his tongue, “So Lady Jiang still gives Yang Wan a face nowadays?”
Deng Ying just smiled without speaking.
Though Lady Jiang hadn’t appeared personally, she had tacitly allowed Yang Wan to use her name to request Imperial Physician Peng to treat Deng Ying.
The torture wounds Deng Ying received had mostly healed in prison, but the critical issue was the old injury on his ankle. It had been severely damaged before, and now with new injuries on top, when Imperial Physician Peng examined Deng Ying, even slight pressure made him frown in pain.
Yang Wan bent down, covering Deng Ying’s legs with the quilt, and said to Imperial Physician Peng, “Please be gentle, he’s in pain.”
Imperial Physician Peng smiled, “Of course, it hurts. I’m only touching where the blood is stagnant. Once we apply medicine to disperse it, it will improve. The most painful spot is here.”
As he spoke, he reached to squeeze, but Yang Wan quickly said, “Ah, don’t squeeze it, it hurts…”
Imperial Physician Peng looked up and said, “I’m squeezing his foot, Miss Wan, why are you the one saying it hurts?”
Yang Wan started, unconsciously tucking her hair behind her ear, saying somewhat embarrassedly, “I… I’m just nervous watching.”
Deng Ying held Yang Wan’s hand, pulling her to stand straight, “Wan-wan, just sit and watch. I’m not really in pain, it just looks very swollen.”
Imperial Physician Peng said, “Don’t make up lies to deceive her. If this doesn’t hurt, then nothing in this world would hurt.”
Yang Wan sat beside Deng Ying, looking at his ankle, “What else can be done to treat it?”
Imperial Physician Peng looked up and asked Deng Ying, “Can you walk normally?”
Deng Ying nodded.
“When you walk, are you constantly enduring pain?”
Deng Ying secretly glanced at Yang Wan.
Yang Wan said irritably, “Why are you looking at me? Can’t you be honest in front of the Imperial Physician?”
Deng Ying quickly turned his head back, truly answering honestly, “When I walk for a long time, it does hurt quite badly, but these past few days I haven’t left the bed, and I feel it’s gotten much better.”