Talking with him right now, Shu Nian felt like she was chatting with her psychologist Wang Yue. She confided in him, and he provided timely and correct guidance, gave her encouragement, and helped her emotions gradually calm down.
But it also felt somewhat different.
Shu Nian had once read online that when seeing a psychologist, such situations often occurred.
Because one opens up completely to the psychologist, feeling that only they can understand oneself, feeling relaxed when with them, and then a special feeling develops.
Not the kind of feeling between doctor and patient, but one more inclined toward male-female attraction, a feeling that makes one’s heart race.
Shu Nian had never felt this way with Wang Yue, but at this moment, she felt like she had found it with Xie Ruhe. It was an emotion that made her mind go blank, leaving her completely unsure of how to react.
It was an emotion she was tasting for the first time in all her years.
Shu Nian hesitantly asked: “Find you… really?”
Xie Ruhe raised his hand, hesitated for two seconds, then continued to lift it, comfortingly patting her head and firmly repeating: “Yes, you can find me.”
Once, you illuminated my world.
Now that you’ve fallen into the abyss, even if I can barely protect myself, I’m willing to rush in without regard for my safety to rescue you.
I’m also willing to take the light you gave me, cup it in both hands and return it to you.
Xie Ruhe didn’t let Shu Nian see him off, instead calling Fang Wencheng to come up and help him down. Standing at the stairway entrance, he said goodbye to her: “Then we’ll set off fireworks together next time.”
Shu Nian nodded slightly: “Okay, goodbye.”
She watched their retreating figures, lowered her eyes, and casually brought the bucket by the door inside.
Shu Nian crouched against the door, hugging her legs, seeming lost. Who knows what she was thinking? After a long while, she suddenly stood up and bounced back to her room with bare feet.
But she quickly remembered how late it was and immediately quieted her movements.
She took her clothes to the bathroom and quickly showered, her brain like a pink-bubbling paste being stirred about, no longer feeling that fear.
She felt as if she were filled with something else, her heart full and brimming.
Shu Nian covered her face as hot water slid down from the top of her head, clear and bright, washing away all negative emotions and cleansing the thoughts that had arisen in that instant.
She inexplicably recalled Xie Ruhe’s appearance again.
His short, fine hair; dark, bright almond eyes; dense, long eyelashes covering them like raven feathers; straight nose bridge; lips like flower petals. When he spoke seriously, he would lower his eyes, as if radiating charm, and the corners of his lips would curve slightly.
His figure was slender yet tall, his demeanor noble and outstanding.
He was somewhat good-looking.
Was he somewhat good-looking?
Shu Nian dazedly put on her clothes and returned to her room while drying her hair with a towel. Fresh from the shower, water droplets still fell from her hair tips, her face fair with a light pink flush on both cheeks.
She sniffled and whispered: “Handsome.”
The soft sound dissolved in the quiet room, merging with the air.
Shu Nian instantly came to her senses, realizing what she had said, and hurriedly tossed aside the towel in her hand. She raised her head as if struck dumb and forcefully knocked on her forehead.
Could it be that she had improper thoughts about Xie Ruhe…
“Don’t overthink things,” Shu Nian said in a muffled tone, then emphasized again as if to reinforce, “Don’t overthink things.”
Not wanting to let her mind wander, Shu Nian decided to find something to do. She picked up the script on her bedside table and used a highlighter to mark her lines, reading one aloud: “How can this man radiate such a deadly attraction…”
“…” Shu Nian pursed her lips, turned a page, and continued marking, “Qianqian, I’ve fallen for a friend of mine, what should I do?”
Shu Nian: “…”
She capped her pen, fell backward, buried her face in the pillow, and kicked her feet forcefully in the air. After a long while, Shu Nian calmed down, feeling somewhat confused and helpless.
Shu Nian picked up her phone and searched online for “what to do if you fall for your good friend,” seeing a row of negative answers. She immediately exited and recalled the previous scene.
She paused, hesitantly changing “good friend” to “psychologist.”
Most answers suggested it was due to empathy, finding support during vulnerable moments, becoming dependent on one’s psychologist, and possibly misinterpreting these emotions as love.
Shu Nian naively processed these words.
She exhaled, no longer continuing to read this content, and casually opened WeChat. Only then did she discover that Xie Ruhe had sent her several messages—
[I’m coming over to find you now.]
[What’s wrong with you?]
[I’m at your doorstep.]
Shu Nian licked her lips, not knowing how to respond.
Noticing a red dot on her contacts, Shu Nian instinctively clicked on it—it was a friend request. She glanced at the profile; the person in the avatar was Xu Zeyuan, with a note: [Shu Nian, I’m Xu Zeyuan, I want to talk to you.]
Her gaze paused for a second before she directly exited. Then, she replied to Xie Ruhe: [Take care on the way.]
It had been over a month since she last saw Xu Zeyuan.
Shu Nian had almost forgotten this person. She thought that since his fame had grown, he should be busy with many things every day and shouldn’t contact someone as insignificant as her again.
But he came looking for her again.
Shu Nian didn’t quite understand him.