Lin Zhixia remained silent. She stood there, waiting for her mother to comfort her.
But today her mother was in a bad mood. Lin Zhixia was about to cry, but her mother didn’t say a single soft word to her.
Her mother only said: “Your school is ranked number one in the city, and the leadership makes decisions without considering the economic conditions of students’ families. 76 yuan, it’s not that I can’t afford it, I just hate to see you waste it. Our family doesn’t revolve around just you; you need to consider others more, don’t make everyone revolve around you, seeing how selfish and useless you are! Understand?”
Lin Zhixia felt increasingly sad and began to cry silently.
She wasn’t crying because she couldn’t go to the aquarium. She didn’t know where this sad emotion came from. Why do people shed tears when they cry? This way, people who see her tears would know she’s very upset.
Lin Zhixia stood at the kitchen doorway, wanting to speak but hesitating.
Half a bowl of red chili peppers went into the wok, and pale white smoke swirled around. Her mother was also choked and sneezed.
A small fan was installed at the side of the stove. The axis of the fan had long been congealed with oil grime. Her mother used a chopstick to poke the fan blades, giving the fan initial momentum to rotate and blow away some of the smoke in the kitchen.
Lin Zhixia called out: “Mom.”
Her mother asked her, “Do you still want to go to the aquarium? Has everything I’ve said to you been for nothing?”
Lin Zhixia said listlessly, “I won’t go anymore. I don’t want to eat dinner tonight either.”
She failed to arouse her mother’s sympathy and instead increased her mother’s anger to another level.
The “buzzing” rotation sound of the electric fan stopped at that moment. Her mother put down the spatula and said without any emotion: “Don’t eat then! Who are you trying to scare? Go to your room now! Come out when you’ve come to your senses.”
Ever since learning about the autumn excursion in the afternoon, Lin Zhixia had been excited and thrilled. She had been looking forward to getting home early to share the good news with her parents, but she hadn’t expected it would end up like this.
Last semester’s spring excursion cost each student 34 yuan, and her mother had readily given Lin Zhixia the money.
And… the class fee, library borrowing fee, subway transportation fee, and provincial library internet usage fee from last month, totaling 74.45 yuan, were all paid by her mother.
Why couldn’t she go this time? Was it because 76 yuan was too much?
Lin Zhixia was very confused. She sat in her room thinking: So my happiness is built upon money. Have I studied transcendentalism and a priori principles? Both of these principles advocate for a person to abandon material enjoyment.
At 6:30 in the evening, it was already dark.
The moon outside the window was so round and bright, the stars had a soft halo, and Lin Zhixia saw the “Beta Andromedae” of the Andromeda galaxy.
The so-called “Beta Andromedae” is the brightest star in the Andromeda galaxy.
Recent scientific research has shown that the Milky Way and Andromeda are getting closer and closer. Billions of years later, the Milky Way will collide with Andromeda.
Lin Zhixia looked up at the sky and muttered to herself: “Andromeda, Milky Way, don’t be deceived by each other’s gravitational pull. The closer you get, the easier it is to be absorbed. Do you know why a term in the Lagrangian of quantum chromodynamics breaks CP symmetry? Have you understood the Peccei-Quinn theory? The mass of quarks cannot be zero. If there exists Peccei-Quinn symmetry, I think the universe would have dark matter. Can you sense the dark matter in the universe?”
Looking up at the sky and expressing her thoughts made Lin Zhixia feel relaxed. The only problem was that her stomach was growling with hunger.
Gurgle gurgle, it wouldn’t stop.
Being hungry was uncomfortable.
Lin Zhixia fell onto her bed, hugging a kitten plush toy, burying her entire face in the fluffy fabric.
She could hear the sounds of bowls and chopsticks from the living room; her father, mother, and brother were all eating.
Tonight’s dishes included stir-fried cabbage, asparagus with dried tofu, braised pork ribs, and tomato egg soup, all of which were Lin Zhixia’s favorites.
She felt so wronged and wanted to eat.
But she said she wouldn’t eat, so she wouldn’t eat!
A person of integrity doesn’t drink from a stolen spring, and an honest person doesn’t accept charity food!
Lin Zhixia would rather faint from hunger on her bed today! She absolutely would not run to the living room to grab a bowl of food!
Absolutely would not eat!
Lin Zhixia had principles!
*
In the living room, Lin Zhixia’s father said softly: “That’s enough, call her out to eat.”
Her mother spoke even more softly: “I’ve saved half of the ribs for her. The cabbage and dried tofu are in bowls, I’ll heat them for her in a while.”
“What happened?” Lin Zeqiu suddenly asked, biting into his chopsticks, “Why did you scold her and not let her come to the table for dinner? Is this some rural custom about not letting girls eat at the table or what?”
Her father glared at him: “Say less, don’t make your mother angrier.”
Lin Zeqiu sighed almost inaudibly: “Mom, why are you angry?”
Her mother looked at Lin Zhixia’s tightly closed door and replied with a tired expression: “Nothing major. I ran into some trouble when restocking in the early morning today, it’s all resolved now, I just have some pent-up frustration. You and your sister are both in school, your father and I need to support two children, some things are completely unnecessary to buy, unnecessary to spend on… Your sister’s school is organizing an autumn excursion, each person needs to pay 76 yuan to go to the marine aquarium. The aquarium tickets are so expensive, your sister wanted to go, I scolded her, and now she’s not eating dinner.”
“It’s all spoiling her. Letting her cool off is good, let her think about it herself.” Her father chimed in. He picked up his chopsticks and lunchbox, returning to the front door to continue watching the business.
Lin Zeqiu ate a few bites of rice, feeling very uncomfortable.
He was Lin Zhixia’s brother, having grown up with her, and knew her personality better than anyone. Lin Zhixia loved eating; her favorite fruit was strawberry, her favorite dish was braised pork ribs, and her favorite soup was tomato egg soup.
Tonight, she could give up braised pork ribs and even tomato egg soup, which showed she was unusually upset.
The family had three bedrooms in total, the largest belonged to Lin Zhixia, and the smallest to Lin Zeqiu. The family status was evident.
Lin Zeqiu originally didn’t want to manage Lin Zhixia. He had always felt that his parents were too biased, overly caring for his sister with an unusual intellect. But thinking that Lin Zhixia might be hiding in her room, crying her heart out, Lin Zeqiu found his meal tasteless.
The incandescent light in the living room flickered; perhaps his eyes were playing tricks on him.
The cold wind howled outside. Tonight, a cold wave was coming, the temperature dropped, and a thin mist formed on the glass windows. In such freezing weather, how could one not eat?