Xie Yuzhang smiled faintly and said, “A human heart is always flesh and blood in the end.”
Fuchun’s unwillingness to follow her to Mobei was genuine. But the guilt and affection he felt in his heart toward her was also genuine.
Everyone was like that, was it not? Fuchun was. Father Emperor was too.
What about the future emperor? What would she need to do to make a deeper, more lasting impression on the future emperor?
In the eyes of all those around her, everyone believed that once Xie Yuzhang departed, she would be like Princess Shanqi — with no hope of returning within this lifetime. Only Xie Yuzhang herself knew that sooner or later she would come back to this city of Yunjing.
Everything Xie Yuzhang had done differently in this reborn life, compared to her past life, served two purposes — to prepare for life during the marriage alliance, and to prepare for life after her return.
The former had taken rough shape in her mind. It was a matter of money, material goods, and people.
The latter was still hazy, and she could only follow her instincts.
The Crown Princess, Lady Yu, came to Zhaoxia Palace in person to call upon her.
Xie Yuzhang had cried so much over these past two days that when Lady Yu began to weep, she found she had no more tears. So she simply did not cry, and instead took Lady Yu’s hands and turned the tables, comforting her. “Sister-in-law, please do not worry. Life is what a person makes of it.”
Lady Yu had the exact same impression as everyone else who had been in contact with Xie Yuzhang recently, and on returning to the Eastern Palace she said to the Crown Prince with a sigh, “Princess Baohua has truly grown up.”
There was nothing particularly pleasant about seeing the young women of one’s own family grow up and mature overnight. Among his sisters, Princess Anle was naturally in an opposing position to him by circumstance, the other two were still young, and Xie Yuzhang was the one who had been closest to him.
The Crown Prince’s heart was heavy.
If not for the regional military governors who held their own armies and had made the Emperor wary, there would be no need to send an actual princess to the frontier in a marriage alliance.
The Crown Prince’s resolve to curtail the military governors’ power grew even more firm.
“Younger sister also has one more thing to entrust to you.” Lady Yu said to her husband. “Father Emperor has promised her five hundred soldiers, and these men must all be drawn from the capital’s military garrisons. Baohua is worried that those below will deceive her and fill the ranks with the old, the weak, and the infirm who would only be a burden. She has heard that among the Hu people’s tribal settlements there are constant skirmishes, with raiding and plundering of goods and women at every turn. She is frightened and unsettled. Only those five hundred soldiers give her any peace of mind…”
“I understand.” The Crown Prince said. “Tell her that I will oversee this personally and see to it that she gets a proper, orderly group of capable men.”
Lady Yu let out a breath of relief.
The following day she sent someone from her side to Zhaoxia Palace to relay this to Xie Yuzhang.
Another measure of peace settled in Xie Yuzhang’s heart.
“Palace maids and eunuchs are nothing more than a means of making my life more comfortable. Even Attendant Xu — she is not truly irreplaceable. To hold her against her will serves no purpose. A person whose heart has already left may not necessarily serve me well regardless. There is no need to take any particular action. Simply refraining from certain actions, doing less of certain things, would be more than enough to cause me hardship.” She said to Lin Fei. “What truly matters is not the people around me. What matters is how much wealth I hold in my hands, and whether I have sufficient strength to protect my people and my personal assets.”
The words she said to Lin Fei carried deliberate explanation and obvious reassurance in them, but this was precisely what Lin Fei needed to hear at that moment, and so she did not notice the manner in which Xie Yuzhang spoke these words.
The Fifth Prince also came to visit Xie Yuzhang, and he comforted her by saying, “I spoke with Father Emperor, and when the time comes, I will escort you on your way.”
Of the Emperor’s still-living sons, the Crown Prince was ranked third. After him came the fifth, seventh, eighth, ninth, eleventh, and twelfth — seven princes in all.
Most of the imperial princes had died in childhood. The First Prince had survived to adulthood and had been enfeoffed as Crown Prince as the eldest living imperial son, but unexpectedly he had died of a seasonal epidemic two years ago. After that, the Third Prince, as the oldest still-living prince, was enfeoffed as Crown Prince.
After the Crown Prince came the Fifth Prince, whose birth mother was only a Brilliant Companion. The youngest, the Twelfth Prince, was born of Noble Consort Chen — the full brother of Princess Anle.
The Fifth Prince had been clearly sensing these days that ever since the afternoon she had been afflicted by that nightmare, this younger sister had not been as warm and familiar with him as before.
Sure enough, when Xie Yuzhang looked at him, there was always something strange in her gaze. He could not describe exactly what it was, but it was utterly unlike before.
“Elder brother,” Xie Yuzhang said abruptly, without any preamble. “Drinking leads to mistakes. In the future, elder brother should drink less.”
The Fifth Prince was baffled. “I haven’t been drunk lately.”
Xie Yuzhang offered no explanation.
The Fifth Prince asked, “Are you just going to spend every day shut up inside the palace from now until your wedding?”
Xie Yuzhang was slightly startled, then said, “It’s not that I’m deliberately shutting myself away. I simply have nothing in particular to do.”
The consorts, gauging the Emperor’s expression and perceiving that he seemed to feel guilty toward her, were all putting on a show of attentive concern — visiting her and offering wedding gifts to demonstrate their goodwill. Their ultimate aim was still nothing more than to curry favor with the Emperor.
As for the daughters of noble families who had previously come and gone in her company, they had sent gifts at most, but their persons were nowhere to be seen. The banquets and outings they had once enjoyed together no longer included an invitation for her.
Xie Yuzhang put it together and asked, “What does the outside world think of my situation?”
The Fifth Prince said, “What else could they think?” Naturally they assumed Princess Baohua was washing her face in tears.
Xie Yuzhang understood, and had nothing to say.
The Fifth Prince said, “Why not go out and clear your head?”
Xie Yuzhang had nothing to do anyway. And once she left, she feared it would again be many years before she could see the landscapes of Da Zhao.
“That sounds good.” She said.
The people of Yunjing, having heard the news that Princess Baohua was to be sent as a marriage alliance to Mobei, all assumed that this Princess was spending her days shut away in the palace, weeping. No one expected that on this particular day, a group of noble young men and women who had arranged an outing — going hunting and for a barbecue outside the city walls — would find Princess Baohua, Xie Yuzhang herself, appearing among them.
Everyone was astonished.
Contrary to all expectations, Princess Baohua showed none of the misery they had imagined. Quite the opposite — she appeared entirely at ease, more carefree than anyone else, as though nothing had happened at all.
People were stiff at first, guarded in their speech, but seeing that Xie Yuzhang’s expression was one of calm serenity, they gradually relaxed.
“Baohua,” said a round-faced young girl who rode alongside Xie Yuzhang, “Did you receive the things I sent?”
Xie Yuzhang said without a flicker of change, “I received them.” In truth, she could not for the moment recall who this young girl was.
“I’ve been worried about you all these days, but I never had the chance to enter the palace,” the girl said. “Yesterday, Mother went into the palace to pay respects to the Noble Consort, and I asked her to stop and visit you on the way. She told me not to cause trouble, said you certainly wouldn’t want to see anyone just now. I’ve been worried to death — but seeing you today, I can finally set my heart at ease.”
As she spoke, she let out a light sigh of relief.
Taking advantage of the time while the girl talked, Xie Yuzhang racked her memory frantically, and at last remembered who she was.